The marathon year of January has finally ended, filled with shock and awe news updates, and I am neither shocked nor awed. American history’s track record of suppressing marginalized communities isn’t exactly breaking news, so my reaction is more of an exhausted eyeroll than shock. Cue Aaron Parnas TikToks filling me with existential dread. Put a finger down if you currently feel: scared, overwhelmed, exhausted, angry, achingly sad, desperate, hopeless, numb, anxious, and/or depressed. Yeah, me too.
I’ll never forget the summer of 2020, working as a USPS mail hauler during the COVID-19 pandemic while Black Lives Matter protests swept the nation. I was listening to the Busy Phillips podcast, where writer Shantira Jackson vented about the 2020 election:
“If I’m being completely honest, I’m tired of donating all my money. I’m tired of having to save democracy because of white supremacy. Truly.”
Her words resonated deeply, especially the idea that the burden of saving democracy often falls on the already marginalized. Fast-forward to 2025, and advocacy anxiety is still here. The big question: where are we choosing to channel our energy? With causes like LGBTQIA+ rights, battling racism and antisemitism, immigration rights, and abortion rights in danger all screaming for attention, it’s overwhelming to decide where to start.
In my first year of grad school, I took the Fundamentals of Counseling and Ethics. The critical lesson that both these classes drill in is that as counselors, it is imperative that we take care of ourselves and maintain mental wellbeing in order to effectively support our clients. The classic airplane analogy says it best: put on your oxygen mask before helping others. As counselors, we’re no good to anyone if we’re running on empty.
That advice applies to advocacy, too. When we’re stuck in fight-or-flight mode, our amygdala takes over, scanning for danger nonstop and leaving us in a constant state of anxiety. It’s all feels, no logic. Sometimes the emotions are so overwhelming we can’t even name them. So, how do we shift gears to find direction and balance?
There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to self-care, just like there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to advocacy. But it does take some time to learn what works for you.
The answer lies in mindfulness. This is the opposite of doomscrolling on your phone (Note: I need to take my own advice).
Methods like Box Breathing can work wonders. Here’s how it goes: inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 4, and hold again for 4. This simple practice helps regulate your emotions, heart rate, and breathing.
Other techniques include the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method and body scans, which encourage you to listen to what your body is telling you. What feels off? What needs attention? How can we support ourselves in those areas? Listen closely.
Finding peace in chaos takes intention, but it is a coping skill that can be learned. I encourage you to find what brings you relief during times of unease and make space for those activities. The more these sorts of things are practiced, especially when stress is not at a critical mass, the more they will be readily accessible for your brain to practice willingly when the shit hits the fan.
We are living at a time where purely existing is an act of rebellion. It makes sense to feel that, in a world we are told we are not enough, that our advocacy efforts are not enough. But that simply isn’t true. As with self-care, find what energizes you in a positive way. Maybe that means sharing articles online, or maybe it means joining a community organization. Maybe it means donating time, energy, money, or attention to a specific cause.
It is far too easy to judge ourselves for not “doing enough” and I urge you, especially right now, that you are always doing enough and you always ARE enough. When we stop judging ourselves and embrace self-care, we become sturdier containers for holding compassion and acting with intention. And when those containers inevitably crack? That’s when we breathe, repair, and move forward.
And that’s more than okay – it’s human.