Hello! Here with a quick bite for you on a topic I see folks broaching often: the daunting task of selecting the right counselor to begin (or continue!) your therapy journey.
Many folks begin their therapy journey by exploring counseling directory websites like Psychology Today or Therapy Den. While it’s awesome that we can utilize such resources, it can definitely get pretty overwhelming for folks who aren’t familiar with the process, have had a bad experience before, or are managing symptoms of depression, anxiety, ADHD, or other mental health “stuff.”
With so many professionals offering diverse specialties and approaches, how do you find the one who’s best suited to meet your needs? Finding a counselor who can provide the support and guidance you need for a successful therapeutic journey is paramount to your success: not only because you want someone with the right skills, but you also want to feel motivated to continue therapy, actually go to appointments, and feel like you can be real with your counselor to get the best bang for your buck.
Why Finding the Right Counselor Matters
Choosing the right counselor is crucial for effective therapy. A good fit between you and your counselor can lead to:
- Improved Communication: Feeling comfortable with your counselor ensures open and honest communication, which is essential for effective therapy. You want to see a counselor who “gets it.” Explaining what gender identity is to a counselor probably feels annoying and discouraging to a trans person who wants to get therapy for dysphoria. Explaining what forced feminization and sissification is to a counselor who is painstakingly asking what a chastity cage is can feel like a fucking nightmare. Nobody wants to go to therapy and have harrowing moments that make them stay awake at 3am from the awkwardness. So, seeing a counselor and feeling comfortable to share will benefit therapy-seekers greatly. Getting to the root of what’s going on is the main dish of therapy and so ensuring you are a good communication match with your therapist is paramount.
- Better Outcomes: When you connect well with your counselor, you’re more likely to achieve your therapeutic goals and see positive results. In therapy school, you learn that one of the major predictors of success in therapy is the therapeutic alliance, or the relationship between therapist in client. The effects of the therapeutic alliance can be more salient than even the techniques used in therapy. A strong therapeutic alliance encourages active participation by the client in their own healing process, leading to more successful outcomes in therapy. Most people go to therapy with positive intentions of its success. So picking the right practitioner, ensuring a good fit, and investing your energy into this relationship are of the utmost importance.
- Increased Engagement: A strong therapeutic relationship encourages commitment and active participation in the counseling process. Feeling like you want to talk with your counselor, and feeling like you can share anything and receive acceptance and feedback over judgment and dismay is so important. Clients who are engaged in the therapy process help themselves, reflecting between sessions and implementing change in the other 167 hours in the week you’re not in the therapy chair.
Key Considerations When Choosing a Counselor
- Identify Your Needs and Goals
Before starting your search, take some time to reflect on your specific needs and goals. Are you looking for help with anxiety, relationship issues, or personal growth? Understanding your objectives will help you find a counselor who specializes in those areas.
- Research Counselor Specializations
Counselors often have different areas of expertise. Some may focus on individual therapy, while others specialize in couples or family counseling. Look for a counselor whose specialization aligns with your needs. Common specializations include:
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Effective for treating anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. We learned this in school as the gold standard of treatment, particularly because in Western society this is one of the most studied modalities and therefore correlated with positive change in many scholarly articles and meta analyses.
- Trauma Counseling: Ideal if you’ve experienced traumatic events and need support in healing. Having a practitioner who is trauma-informed is helpful to hold space for those who may experience somatic (body) trauma symptoms in addition to mental health symptoms.
- Relationship Counseling: Useful for couples or families facing relational challenges. Ensuring your counselor is well-equipped to do this work is paramount to success. I (Sara) for example definitely don’t excel at this work; I’m an individual therapist through and through. Many individual counselors work closely with those that do couple’s and family work, and will have referrals to recommended providers (like Dinnette).
- Check Credentials and Qualifications
Ensure that the counselor is licensed and accredited by relevant professional organizations. Credentials such as Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), or Psychologist (Ph.D. or Psy.D.) indicate that the counselor has met the necessary educational and professional standards.
Seeing a pre-licensed counselor (recently known as a licensed professional counselor associate in PA) can also be a helpful approach for lower-cost therapy that offers you a fresh perspective from a new counselor who is also qualified to offer treatment who has not yet accrued an amount of hours to apply for licensure (3,000 in PA). For folks managing financial concerns of treatment, for example, it might feel more helpful to see a pre-licensed clinician weekly, as opposed to a fully licensed counselor biweekly, to obtain better and more consistent results in therapy.
- Consider Therapy Approaches
Different counselors use various therapeutic approaches. Research these methods to find one that resonates with you. For example:
- Humanistic Therapy: Focuses on personal growth and self-actualization. Counselors offer unconditional positive regard for clients, which is helpful to build a therapeutic alliance and increase your comfort in self-disclosure in the counseling room.
- Solution-Focused Therapy: Aims to find solutions to current problems rather than delving into past issues. Clients and counselors form no-nonsense treatment plans and work on following “to-do’s” in the present rather than working on overly analyzing connections in their past.
- Mindfulness-Based Therapy: Incorporates mindfulness practices to manage stress and improve emotional regulation. MBSR, as it’s also known, can help folks with active fight-or-flight responses calm somatic anxiety and lean more into the present moment to reduce effects of anxiety and stress.
- Evaluate Compatibility
Personal rapport is essential for successful therapy. During your initial consultation, assess how comfortable you feel with the counselor. Trust your instincts—if you feel at ease and heard, it’s a good sign. If not, it’s okay to seek someone else. Picking a counselor can feel like getting the right hairdresser: you want to vibe on your vision of the cut and style, and if their work doesn’t align with your vision (don’t worry it’ll grow back!) you can shame-free go to a new provider and seek a better fit.
- Check Availability and Logistics
Practical considerations also play a role in finding the right counselor. Check their availability, location, and whether they offer online sessions if that’s important to you. Ensure their office hours align with your schedule and that their practice is accessible.
- Read Reviews and Seek Recommendations
Look for reviews from other clients to gauge the counselor’s reputation. Many folks seek counselors through personal recommendations from friends, family, or healthcare providers which can also provide valuable insight into a counselor’s work, experience, and fit for your specific needs.
Questions to Ask During Your First Consultation
To make the most of your initial meeting, consider asking the following questions:
- What is your experience and expertise in [my area of concern]?
- What therapeutic approaches do you use?
- How do you measure progress and success in therapy?
- What is your schedule like, and what openings do you have? (& Weekly/biweekly?)
- What’s the financial commitment, & what’s the policy for submitting claims to insurance?
Taking the Next Step
Finding the right counselor can be transformative, offering you the support and tools to navigate life’s challenges effectively. If you’re liking what you’re reading and seeing, and feel ready to start your journey toward finding the perfect therapeutic match, don’t hesitate to reach out to a counselor, whether it’s giving a call, dropping a line on a contact form, sending a message on Psychology Today, or shooting someone an email. Explain your situation, what you’re looking for in therapy, and ask for a free consultation as a next step.
You got this!
You can absolutely find the right counselor for you! 🙂